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Articles written by Virgil Vaupel

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  • Who is Fighting Whom?

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Jan 18, 2017

    Therein lies the rub. Who is fighting whom in the Middle East? We already know some of it is Muslim against Christians. Been going on for centuries. Nothing new. Then there’s the different sects of Muslims fighting each other. Then we have the Northern Irelanders fighting the Irelanders. The Germans were fighting Europe and Asia. Syria fighting Lebanon, Iran fighting Iraq, all seven of the “stan” countries fighting each other. Somalians fighting each other. Some folks think we were fighting North Korea in the Korean “Conflict.” Those same folk...

  • A New Word in Farming: 'Autonomous'

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Jan 11, 2017

    The word autonomous used to be attached mostly to governments. According to my Funk and Wagnalls it means “ acting independently or having the ability to do so.” “Robotics” comes to mind as well. Something that doesn’t need continual watching or manipulating to function in the manner it was designed to function. You’ve seen the robotic vacuum cleaner advertised on TV I’m sure. That would be a good description of autonomous and robotics. I wonder if an airplane on auto-pilot would be considered autonomous. Imagine a highway where trucks are be...

  • National Anthem Revisited

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Dec 21, 2016

    Why do singers want to discombobulate, so rudely, the Star Spangled Banner? Folks, this tune should be revered not reviled. I hear singer after singer trying to put their own twist to this wonderful yet difficult to sing song, failing miserably, most of the time. As written, the song has a definite number of notes but a majority of the performers insist on taking it to a level that renders the song undistinguishable to the human ear. I've heard young women in sports venues drag it on to over two minutes trying to make it their own. Ladies,...

  • Defining 'Puffery'

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Dec 14, 2016

    The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) has decreed that - in law, Puffery is a promotional statement or claim that expresses subjective rather than objective views, which no “reasonable person” would take literally. Whaaat? Seem that the FTC says it is perfectly ok if your Italian BMT doesn’t look anything like the picture of the one hanging on the wall menu. See, the one on the wall shows about a half pound of meat along with a whole garden salad of veggies and a huge assortment of cheese. The thing is so stuffed with BMT that the bun gapes open...

  • I Will Be A President For All The People P.S. The Check's In The Mail

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Dec 7, 2016

    Trump’s no dummy. But neither is he brilliant. A brilliant person who has just become President-elect of the United States would not make such a statement as “I will be a president for all the people.” Hey! President-elect Trump I am not in favor of same sex marriages. How are you going to make me change my feelings on that subject? I am not in favor of the TTP agreement although many are. Are you going to make me like it? I’m favorable to the XL pipeline project. How are you going to MAKE those opposed change their minds? My opinion is that...

  • On Tax Reduction

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Nov 30, 2016

    First, to taxes as I see it. Every Presidential candidate since Nero has promised lower taxes. Here’s a quickie run-down of how the income tax occurred in the US. 1791 to 1802 federal taxes on booze, tobacco, snuff, slaves, refined sugar, carriages, property sold at auction and corporate bonds. The war of 1812 caused taxes to be levied on gold, silverware, jewelry and watches. In 1817, Congress nixed all internal taxation and relied on tariffs on imported goods to sustain the country’s financial needs. (This would work for us now if Congress wo...

  • All Together Now, or Not

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks For Listening|Nov 16, 2016

    Have ya’ seen it? All those Gen Xer’s, Millenials and Dreamers, along with a dubious assortment of disgruntled movie actors on the evening news protesting the election of Donald J. Trump? They had best take a closer look at what they’re saying and thank their lucky stars that this is still a country that allows them the right to vote. Win or Lose. That’s what it’s all about. Your choice doesn’t win. You’re going to leave the country. Your choice’re gloatful! Chants of “Not My President” echoed through the streets of Boston, Seattle,...

  • On The EEOC

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Nov 9, 2016

    James Brovard proclaims, in his book Freedom in Chains “EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission) officials have proclaimed private companies guilty of violating or impeding 'equal opportunity' because of their failure to 'race-norm' test scores. The EEOC claims some companies covertly increased the test scores of “protected groups” to make them appear more qualified than other test takers. One upscale woman's clothing store chain was cited by the EEOC for not hiring men for sales jobs that included “helping women to try on clothes...

  • Twixt the Devil and the Sea

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Oct 5, 2016

    It’s getting on to election time. Are you ready? Have you heard enough about the candidates for the next POTUS? Do you believe most of the trash both candidates are talking? Is the Trump fortune enough to sway your good judgment to his side? Is the fact that Hillary is a woman enough for you to cast your vote her way? Here’s the way I see it. Stay tuned for this important message from your friendly ambulance chasers at Dewey, Chasem and Howe, 666 Faked ‘em Lane, Thoeny, MT 592 and a half. We’re back, thanks for sticking around. Now here’s the r... Full story

  • The Debate: Round One

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks For Listening|Sep 28, 2016

    Yikes, folks I haven’t heard so many unanswered questions, so much evasiveness and so many half truths and outright lies since my last face-to-face with my managing editor. The first lie was uttered by Hillary when she told Donald something like “Donald it’s good to be with you here.” In my opinion The Donald came off as extremely boorish, bullysome and rude to the maximum. I simply cannot see him sitting down with any foreign power without insulting that person and maybe putting a screeching halt to any trade deals he could have made. He cons...

  • Despite Hustle, Lady Mavs Lose to Harlem

    Virgil Vaupel, Courier Correspondent|Sep 7, 2016

    VIRGIL VAUPEL COURIER CORRESPONDENT I was late getting to Saco for the volleyball match Sept. 1 so when I finally got there the games had begun. Here's what I saw: There were six young ladies on the Maverick side of the net and they were obviously well coached because almost every time their opponent served the ball the Lady Mavs would return it with a beautiful display of the ol' "Bump, Set and Spike" trick. They were really good at digging the ball up and passing to a teammate, they hit some... Full story

  • The Thing About Water

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Sep 7, 2016

    Oh yeah, you see water all around the United States in our rivers, lakes and streams and think “How can we ever run out of drinking water?” Stay tuned and I’ll give you a tutorial on our diminishing water supply right after a word from our sponsor How Long’s sake’ batter dipped prairie slugs on the half shell. Yum Yumm, and available at your favorite grocery store’s freezer department. Wrapped in either rice paper or corn husks. Your choice. Thanks for stickin’ around. Now to the water situation. The globe is 75 percent covered with water. H... Full story

  • North Country Lady Mavericks Compete in Malta Invitational Opener

    Virgil Vaupel, Courier Correspondent|Aug 31, 2016

    As Maverick head coach Barry Malone told me at the tournament after the first game against Tri-Cities, "We made a lot of unforced errors, but all-in-all I thought we played pretty good for our first time on the court." I saw improvement in their serving over last year, especially Jada Sudbrack who has a cannon serve that has a tendency to drop to the floor just after crossing the net. Coach Malone started his four returning starters from last year, Sudbrack, Mickayla Johnson, Kayleigh Cummings... Full story

  • Is Trump The Chump?

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Aug 24, 2016

    I tend to get a tad bit radical in my thinking from time to time. It helps clear my brain. Now, for the benefit of my 18.3441 readers, I would expound my theory as to why I think Trump is the Chump. I’ll have more on that later in the broadcast, but first a word from the friendly folks at Mother Mabel’s Merry Matrimonial Manor and A-One Crematorium conveniently housed in the same building as Jakes Juicy Jackalope Jerky. Our motto is “Only the best road kill is good enough to be called Jakes.” Strange things happen in this country that are somet...

  • Evening Entertainment Shines with Emerson Drive

    Virgil Vaupel, For the Courier|Aug 3, 2016

    Emerson Drive started out back in 1995 going under the name of 12 Gauge, but a few years later, after the band moved to Nashville, they discovered that 12 Gauge was already used by a rap group. So they changed their name to Emerson Drive. Under that name they have won numerous country music awards both in Canada and in the US. They are a fairly high-energy group and look like a bunch of athletes as they scamper back and forth across the stage drawing the mostly younger crowd deeper into their ac... Full story

  • Stupid Question, Convoluted Answer

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Aug 3, 2016

    Today’s question of the day in the Great Falls Tribune was really stupid. Shows someone didn’t do any research. The question was (paraphrased): “Will the aging work force hurt manufacturing in the United States?” Yikes! If you take the time to question most employers, you will find that us more “ripened” people are far more reliable than the thirty-somethings, many of whom feel that the $26,000+ (in Montana) they can “earn” on welfare far supersedes working for a living. Older folks know the value of working for their money and most abhor the...

  • The Urination Syndrome

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|Jul 27, 2016

    Here’s the plan. I want every one of the 3.14159265 true conservative males over the age of 18, staunch supporter of HRC and who actually reads this nonsense column to take out your wallet and extract 25 percent of its wealth. Now go directly to the bathroom and flush this money right down that John C. Crapper invention called the twalette in polite circles. I want you to repeat this process every time you get a paycheck from now on until the guys in the white coats come to take you away. I call this the Urination Syndrome. It was initially inv...

  • On Guns, the Illusion of Control, and Deregulation

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks For Listening|Jul 13, 2016

    Since the early 1980’s there have been over 200 major publications touting the number of gun laws nationwide at the 20,000 figure. Since the early 1980’s lots of people have been killed with guns, singly or in bunches. No irreverence intended. Just the facts. And what good did all those early gun laws do? I suppose no one can say with any degree of certainty. If we had fewer gun laws would the killings have escalated? Would they have declined? Seems to me that each new piece of gun-trol legislation is presented or written by folks in gov...

  • How to Retire at the Age of 21 on $60K per Year

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks For Listening|Jul 6, 2016

    Intriguing headline, what? It’s true. One can retire and live a life of Riley on a little over $60,600 a year. Free ... No strings ... no obligations, and best of all, NO WORK!! Get paid handsomely while you sit on the beach or hike in the mountains, or enjoy the evening sunset from the back porch while hitting on a doobie supplied, free, by your benefactor. Don’t believe it? Well friends, it’s being done by at least three or ten millions of people all over this great country every year. Some states pay better than others, and in a momen...

  • EPA and Corps of Engineers Out of Control

    Virgil Vaupel|Jun 22, 2016

    What the hell are those two government agencies doing picking on a 77-year-old disabled Navy veteran who is just trying to live out his life in relative mountain comfort and not bother anyone? Seems as time goes by, and more and more people are getting disenchanted with the over-bearing EPA and most other government entities, they manage to step in it again by pushing yet another citizen around and gaining atta boys from their superiors in Washington, D.C. Ok ... stop right there you BHLs. I know Joe Robertson doesn’t actually OWN the land h...

  • Ain't No Such Thing As Just A Few

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks For Listening|Jun 15, 2016

    Don’t pay the ransom! Through nearly inhuman cunning and deceitful deception, I have eluded my captors and have returned to my disheveled home intact. There were jars scattered around the county with “Help Save Virgil” labels printed on them. Some, about 70 percent to 15 percent my way, read “Please keep Virgil.” But they were mostly set up by my own relatives and some disgruntled cribbage opponents. Anyway, here’s a thought. Think about it for just a minute and most of the “thinking” people who peruse Thanks For Listening will tell you there...

  • Attack Ads in Northeast Montana

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks For Listening|May 25, 2016

    I guess some of my liberal opposers will be saying “you’re a fine one to talk about attacking someone in print” and I suppose you’d be a little bit right but this kind of politikkin’ is something more better suited to Texas or Colorado. What I’m yakkin’ about is the mailer young Michael Burns sent out asking for support as he attempts to become our HD33 representative in Helena. The very first thing that struck me as odd was the picture on the flyer of Casey Knudsen. The original shows Casey with long hair, baseball cap on backwards and...

  • Satellite Cable Dish or Antenna

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|May 18, 2016

    My first draft of this week’s column went off into cyber space never to return. While reaching for my coffee, I accidentally hit ctrl and something else and off it went, hurtling at 1.6 million miles per hour through the universe. I tried hitting that little circular blue arrow, but ... no go ... then I tried the search thingie, but my search came up as empty as OJ’s search for the “real killers.” I had already saved it, but that window that says something like “you have made changes to the text, do you want to save the changes before cl...

  • Netflix Roku

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|May 11, 2016

    There are a lot of scams going on every day in this country and I believe I was the almost victim of one of them just the other day. I’ll tell you about this one so’s you can keep a look out for it should it come your way. It involves a company I’ve never heard of before and one everyone in the world has heard of. I can’t afford to pay 80 or 90 bucks a month for Dish Network or DirectTV, so I rely on the 22 channels I can get off the antenna for $20 bucks a year. You heard that one right ... twenty smackers a YEAR folks. And I get all the loc...

  • A Most Embarrassing Moment

    Virgil Vaupel, Thanks for Listening|May 4, 2016

    It took me 73 years and 71 days but I have finally had it! I know I have mentioned this before, but it seems to have fallen on deaf eyes, especially mine, but I don’t see a tangible solution to the growing problem. Several or more of the presidential candidates have given the problem token air time, but I fear there is nothing even the newly-elected president, or president-ess, can do about it. Every time we go to the hardware store, the super market, the clothing store, the farm tractor selling place, the appliance store: every time we go t...

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