On Deadlines

As I come down to the deadline for getting my opinion piece sent into the Courier (noon on Mondays, in case anyone else needs more pressure to perform in their lives), I’m scrambling for new ideas. As I know I’m expected to fill that space (whether anyone cares to read my offerings or not) what has popped into my mind is this: the difficulties of being both a procrastinator and being reliable.

Being a fantastic life-long procrastinator, the first thing I did was look up the definition of that word so I could share it with you, as well as fill some space. Procrastination is the avoidance of doing tasks that need to be accomplished, or the practice of doing more pleasurable things.

That being said, I feel I have it down to an art and have certainly earned my official Procrastinator License. I can consistently put off my tasks by obsessively checking Facebook to see what my myriad friends and family are getting accomplished as I browse. After seeing all their memes, viewing their videos, checking their shared links, their game scores, quiz answers, and reading the occasional original postings, I go over to Words with Friends to see if it’s my turn. (I don’t play that through Facebook, keeping my info safe from Alec Baldwin.)

Now, I also apparently have a Reliability Card, or at least have fooled people into believing I do. I’ve certainly never been required to show it. The definition of reliable is: consistently good in creativity or performance; able to be trusted. Using my Procrastinator License elicited this information, as well as these synonyms for reliable: dependable, good, well founded, authentic, valid, genuine, sound and true. Wow, is my head swelling with pride! Or at least it did until I remembered I’ve just fooled people into believing this of me.

There is a dichotomy between being thought of as reliable and knowing you are a procrastinator. (Dichotomy: a division or contrast between two things that are represented as being opposed or entirely different. And now I’m done with the pedantic lessons for today. You can look up that word for yourselves.)

As I told James last week, when I was coming down to the wire with a piece for the Farm and Ranch edition, deadlines are good. If there weren’t any, I’d still be fiddling around on Facebook, or crocheting in front of the TV, or reading my library book, which will be due soon, for the second time. I’ve only renewed it once - so far. (I will keep my Procrastinator License, thank you.)

I’m sure I had a point to make when I started this, but Facebook is calling, Words with Friends had notified me that it’s my turn again, and I’m beating my deadline with minutes to spare (perhaps I am a little bit reliable?). I guess I’ll have to add Easily Distracted to my licenses.

Maybe next week’s piece will be better, but as my dad always said, “Don’t hold your breath!”