September 4, 2013 | Volume 100 / Number 361

Doesn't Make Much Sense To Me

I’m just sitting here thumbing through the Internet for things to write about with not much in mind. With this being a slow news week (except for Obama intending to get us into yet another foreign war and trying his very best to bankrupt the country) I decided to name off a few things that don’t make sense to me.

• I noticed on my can of oven cleaner a red banner stating, “Safe for use on all self-cleaning ovens.” I’m thinking, If my oven is self-cleaning why did I buy this stuff?

• I’ve heard it said that to make the “real money” one needs only to marry the “madam” of a house of ill repute who also owns a liquor store. (Oh, but wait a minute … Didn’t the government take over the Mustang Ranch in Nevada only to lose so much of the taxpayers money through gross mis-management they ended up selling it? And these are the same individuals we voted for to run the country? Yikes).

• If a person is convicted of forgery or writing bad checks or other crimes committed using a pen why then is that person denied the ownership of a firearm for the rest of his/her life? Wouldn’t it make more sense for them to be denied the use of a writing instrument for the remainder of their life?

• There are 97 countries around the world that have strict gun bans for their citizenry. Honduras is at the top of the list for having 91.6 gun deaths per 100,000 people. Then, 95 countries later, there’s the United States of America with 4.1 accidental gun deaths per 100,000 people per year. Oh, and incidentally, 80 million Americans own guns.

• Why then, is a person having been convicted of multiple DUIs over a span of three or so years allowed to operate any vehicle other than a tractor in a field?

• Why then is it OK for cross-country bicyclists to be restricted to roadways such as Highway 2 across Montana where in some places the white “frost line” is painted on grass but they can’t use the Interstate highway system where the breakdown lanes are wide enough for a semi with a flat tire to be off the main road?

I asked a Highway Patrol person in Helena this very same question and received this reply: “The speed limit on the interstate is 75 mph while it’s “only” 70 mph on the secondary roads.” Zowie, now there’s a real poser. Is a person going to get any more mangled when smucked by a pickup going 75 mph than when hit by the same vehicle traveling a paltry 70 mph?

• Why do people go to jail for fighting in a bar when the same folks can clamber into a wire cage and exhibit the same fighting style and make money?

Is Artificial Intelligence any match for Natural Stupidity?

Our president once said, “My Friends, We live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you’ll join me as we try to change it.”(Say whaaat?)

John Wayne once said, “Life’s tough. It’s even tougher if you’re stupid.

• Does anyone (other that Al Gore) ever actually use the ‘F’ keys?

• In closing, I emailed the Justin Boot company to ask why they are making Justins in China. Their reply was, “By outsourcing our manufacturing to China and Mexico, we are saving American jobs.” (Again … whaaaat?) One has only to know that Warren Buffet, owner of Justin Boot Co., (and I think he’s grandfather to Sunday Buffet appearing weekly at a local restaurant from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m.), also owns BNSF. (Buffet is the founder of Berkshire Hathaway, trading at around $171,000 per share.)

That’s it for now folks. Thanks for listening.

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